Keeper of the Clown Bell

The long MAGA march through American history began on January 22, 2015 when JEB! travelled to Mitt Romney's Salt Lake City home for  a cordial discussion  about the 2016 presidential campaign and Willard was told to back off and wrap his mind around the VP slot ( maybe ). Imagine how Mittens felt during the summer and fall of that year watching John Ellis Bush ("please clap") screw the GOP primary pooch so awkwardly that even with his daddy's Deep State operatives running the campaign the Yankee Floridian could not close on the nomination. With $100 Million in his chinos pocket to squander on advertising by political consultants and endorsements from a long list of politicians and military leaders JEB! was the anointed Republican "leader" and his other primary opponents (except for one) were auditioning for a cabinet secretary role. Poor Mittens watched from the sidelines, swallowing his Mormon pride, while the neocon DEI loving hire got his ever-loving pans...

Now that Pride Month has climaxed and its debauched parades and divisive corporate controversy are fully spent I'd like to make a few post coital observations between puffs of an imaginary smoke while lounging upon my all too real daybed. I'm not at liberty to speak too freely on the subject of homosexuality specifically or the alphabet people in general because when I do, as I have done in the past, I inevitably get berated and ostracized by family and friends who hold different opinions than I do. The general consensus being that their opinions are right while mine are wrong (or evil), it serves no purpose restate what has already been said so eloquently in June's of yore: June 2015  Hamburger Hill #LustWins  - Same-Sex Marriage is philosophically impossible. June 2016  Gay Inc.  - Big Business reigns over the Pride Parade.  June 2018  “God made you like this and loves you like this.”  - The Pope, Andrew Sullivan and FBPOTUS gets schooled on sexualit...

  FBPOTUS congratulates FBWSCJOTUS One of the first "politically aware" moments in my life occurred in 1991 when President Geo. H. W. Bush nominated Clarence Thomas to replace retiring Justice Thurgood Marshall on the Supreme Court. I'm not a lawyer and I didn't care about SCOTUS rulings at the time or the ethnographic/religious makeup of the High Court or Marbury v. Madison or any of that crap I'd learned in American History 101 - but I did care about a guy getting denied a job promotion for the "crime" of making a joke about a  pubic hair on his can of Coca-Cola. Oh, I believed Anita Hill all right, but I didn't believe that anything she said about Clarence Thomas disqualified him from being a judge and, at my relatively young age, I really got myself worked up over the high tech lynching of this share cropper's grandson. I was living in DC that summer and followed the scandal from the start when  Nina Totenberg broke the sexual harassment alle...

One of the many great things about being an American is having a shot at adding your name to the short list of heroes and villains that have clawed their way to the top of the social order and get immortalized in bronze or marble effigy that is shat on by flying rats and spat upon by filthy vagrants ( and southern ladies ) long past your mortal expiration date. Top of that list of quasi-eternals is George Washington who is not only the  Father Of Our Country  but also one of the greatest men in world history and will be studied and remembered for millennia as a person of excellence. The glorious truth is that Washington is so singularly outstanding and his accomplishments so unique that there exists a wide gulf between him and all the conventional "also rans" who incorrectly get equated with him - Founding Fathers Jefferson, Hamilton, Adams, Madison, etc or POTUS's Jackson, Lincoln, Wilson, FDR, etc or Moral Leaders like Colonial Evangelicals, American Progressives and Ci...

A visit to Colombia, South Carolina is always tough because this town is rough and driving through it makes you contemplate many things you’d probably rather sweep under some mental rug in your brain. Just forget about it. Find a diversion - listen to a podcast, read a book, call someone on the phone (anyone) just get me out of this city. Nope. You’re spending the night. So let’s walk up to Capitol Hill and look around shall we? Gravestone for the republic First things first, the trees are magnificent, old and beautiful. Live oaks and palmettos cover the hill and they create a magical backdrop for the Statehouse and surrounding statuary. The Statehouse is a grand replacement of the original the was burned to the ground by General Sherman during his long march through the South. The South Carolinians erected a grave stone commemorating the old building and acknowledging the death of their American republic in 1865. A changed republic rose from the ashes of the old and the defeated south...

  Dirty Derek Timelines and playa’s are funny things and if you are wondering  what the hell is going on  then it behooves you to find a pencil and do as I say. Draw a dot on a piece of paper and mark it 1/15/2019 which, being MLK Jr. Day, is the auspicious date that Kamala Harris chose to announce her run for the presidency of the United States of America surrounded by 25,000 Oakland well wishers. Near that starting point draw a second dot and mark it 4/25/2019 which, being one month after AG Barr sent Congress a 4 page summation of the Meuller report exonerating POTUS Trump, must have seemed like a great time for Biden to enter the dog race and shield himself from scandal and, probably, prosecution. The next mark on this timeline falls on 7/31/2019 when  #KamalaHarrisDestroyed  trended on Twitter after  Tulsi cut our Lotus Flower down  on national television. If you’ve been following my instructions the piece of paper in front of you will have a time...

   When the records of our age are dusted off and examined by future generations of historians what will be their verdict on early 21st Century America and the Pax Americana New World Order that currently manages the affairs of men?  Wut it is? Wut is up? Wut is wut? Wut it do? Wut it don't? Will the critics from the future ever admit that Macklemore’s “Thrift Shop” totally stole Le1f’s beat from “Wut?” that dropped a year earlier. It’s a crime. And it happened in 2015 - BEFORE Trump was elected POTUS. And what will the future Constitutional Monarchists think about the House of Windsor and all that has been done by the hand of Charles, Prince of Whales the clandestinely republican heir apparent to the throne? A perfect toff, this cold chap married a young psychotic commoner and through indifference and adultery tortured his young wife to insanity. She bore two princes but the second son always had the look, and in time the personality, of a red headed bastard. What about ...