Skip to main content

Butt baby learns the horrible truth

The Force is strong in this one.



I'm watching a little Fox & Friends this morning on FNC while putting some cinnamon square cereal in a bowl for my four year old and taking a sip of coffee when I'm confronted with Lord Vader jamming blood red pabulum into the mouth of his son. "I am your father" - the shocking and revolting words uttered by Darth Vader, master of the Dark Side, to his idealistic son who he has just spent the better part of two feature length films trying to kill, who's hand he has severed with a light saber, who's hanging by a thread above the abyss. "If you only knew the power of the Dark Side... Join me... We'll rule the galaxy as father and son." And what does Luke Skywalker do when presented with this horrible truth? See for yourself:


But this young tyke doesn't have just one psychotic, planet destroying, crypto-Nazsi dad - he's got 2! Imagine the horror and mental anguish he will experience when he finally comes of age and realizes that his formative years have been shaped by two Sith Lords who've been working as henchmen for the emperor to enslave the entire universe. Good luck little guy and remember, the Rebel Alliance is waiting for you.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Real Story with Gretchen Carlson

She was "sexy", but "too much hard work." I'm a regular Fox & Friends viewer (mostly in protest of the other insipid morning programs like Today and Good Morning America) so over the years I've gotten to know Gretchen Carlson pretty well. Stuck between Steve and Brian she always seemed a prudish scold with an irritating, self-righteous demeanor that I simply put up with because I figured some people in the Fox audience actually liked her persona. It was obvious that Steve and Brian did not, but they were stuck with her like so many talking heads and had to make the best of it - which they did. Besides, she was no worse than any of the other women on morning show TV - I mean, you're only going to find a certain kind of person to do this kind of work and that kind of person is the Gretchen Carlson kind. Then, one day, she was gone and replaced by Elisabeth Hasselbeck and the F&F ratings began to climb, and climb and climb - in two months view...

0

Total Eclipse

Greatest Headline of All Time Those readers living outside of Charlottesville, VA or Central Virginia proper might not be aware of the ongoing effort to pull down and move the statue of Gen. Robert E. Lee from the town square otherwise known as Lee Park (not named after Harper Lee or Bruce Lee or Stan Lee but after the same Robert E. Lee). Charlottesville is a college town and like all college towns it's filled with college professors and assorted flakes who vote nincompoops into elected office as their representatives so it was no surprise to me when back in April the city council decided to do this : "Despite a pending court case that will ultimately determine the general’s fate, the Charlottesville City Council voted 3-2 Monday night to sell the city’s statue of Confederate Gen. Robert E. Lee." "Confederate General" is a sad, marginalizing descriptor for what surly must be one of the greatest Americans to ever walk this land and lead its people by p...